AKA I'm baaa-aack ... They say travel broadens the mind - *some* of you will be relieved to know that Sally's mind shows absolutely no signs of this whatsoever (a little difficult when one's Appreciation of the Glories of Civilisation kept getting sidetracked by Appreciation of the Glories of French pastries, Austrian cake and Swiss chocolate). :-) Anyway, a few thoughts inspired by the experience ...

Not even My Darling would look good in a passport photo.

Our Heroes should never never never never be imagined in Lederhosen. No, *none* of them, Carol ;-)

We saw Servalan's country house; her town house *was* Harrods's. And as punishment for her sins, BTW, Servie will spend the afterlife in Austrian folk costume.

Aren't they all lucky that Zen's in charge of the maps? A fine vague "take us to Saurian Major" is distinctly better than my "where the hell is Rue de I-Can't-Pronounce-It on the map?" and "what do you mean we should have gotten off three stops ago and we're now in another country???" (Slight exaggeration, contrary to the general expectation that'd I'd end up in Vladivostock by accident, we only got lost three times in Paris and once in Schaffhousen).

And talking of lucky, aren't they also lucky that hairy barbarians all over the galaxy speak purer English than your average tourist? Maybe they all descended from the Swiss.

I want someone to write My Darling a visit to Disneyland Paris. Or Disneyland Proper. Or put him on a package (guided, complete with bouncy, chirpy 'isn't-this-fun' guide) excursion to Merry Blackpool.

Rebel Scum Ltd be damned ... Blake should start recruiting the French rail unions for maximum disruption.

I would not like to share a European hotel room with Gan. Or an off-season seaside B&B room (florally wallpaper, chintzy bedspread and lavender-scented blankets, china kittens and the owner's cute but yappy little dog ... the works) with Avon. Or go visiting the relatives with Vila.

Or have to deal with Avon's leather-n-studs in a French launderette.

As someone who had to cope with 6 currencies in 7 weeks, I want to know where they converted the Treasure Room treasure into spendable cash (Jenna probably knows the right contacts, I guess ...)

In a former life, Tarrant was a French taxi driver. And going from 'Blake', I have my suspicions about Fearless Leader too.

I had my photo taken with a snake, don't ask me why. But in the Appealing Mental pictures file, I have this one of Dayna and Tarrant trying to persuade Vila to have *his* with a Giant Tarzian Warg-Eating Lizard ...

And finally, taking them all on a no-expenses paid (at least not by them) tour ...

Blake would love all the Ancient Monuments and insist on exploring every one of them (I can see him dragging Avon all the way up Montsegur ...)

Gan would love German food.

Tarrant would love white-water rafting, driving in Paris and Disneyland.

Cally would love the Black Forest, the New Forest, Sherwood Forest, the Forest of Dean etc etc etc ... and I do think she'd find Hindu temples appealing, though I'm not sure why.

Vila would love Paris bars and French wine (and German beer). And the challenge of the Crown Jewels.

Dayna would love souvenir shops (after the way she was brought up, I can really really see this - and Avon's face when she spent his money on decorated gold-plated penknives from Zeerok, miniature plastic brains with glow-in-the-dark eyes from Ultraworld, computer-driven military figurines with teeny guns that actually shoot from Vandor, computer-driven snowdomes from Albion, fluffy toy man-eating flowers from Saurian Major and little varnished spiders, carefully posed with musical instruments, from Kairos ..)

Jenna would love French men. And Italian men. And maybe Welsh? :-)

Soolin would love Swiss efficiency (I think I'll fanonically invest her with a collection of cuckoo clocks). And German men.

Avon would *like* a hotel room - in a twelve-star luxury hotel - where none of the rest of them know where to find him again ...

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